Influencer Fatigue and the Search for Real, Honest Opinions

Life sucks. Yep, I said it. Sometimes life just sucks.

I cannot be the only one who feel like giving up and living in a hole sometimes. I know I am not. It feels like, it seems like, every time we think we have things figured out or things are finally starting to move in the right direction, something hits us. Right hook. Something breaks. Left hook. Something horrible happens. Bomb drop. The world goes to pot and now you are stuck.

I feel like a rodent in that stupid wheel running as fast as I can and getting nowhere. No matter what I do or what we do we cannot get our heads above water. We turn right, but we should have turned left. We turn left and we were supposed to go straight. It is never ending.

So yes, life sucks. But life can be wonderful. Do I wish I was not here. No. But do I wish I could hibernate until all the bad goes away and suddenly I or we can get ahead again. Yes. Very much yes.

Yes, I know there are people who have it worse. I hear that all the time. Someone always has it worse than you. That might be true but my feelings are still valid. If I am feeling this way then let me feel this way. We don’t need to guilt each other or go into a competition over who has it worse.

I dislike these type of sayings. Another one I am not a fan of is the grass is not always greener on the other side. Well, you know what. At least it is green. Mine is currently brown and getting browner.

No matter what your status in life is we all feel this way at some point. We just have different versions of what life sucks looks like depending on where we are standing.

Now if your life sucks because you chose to do something awful, illegal, or shady that is on you. You get whatever crap karma hands you. I have no empathy for any of that.

But if you are going through a breakup or financial distress or job loss or the loss of a loved one or illness or family issues, I could keep this list going. I am with you. We are all with you.

Scream it to the sky. Life sucks.

But it can get better. And it will. I have to believe this. No matter what is going on in the world or in my area or in my circle it can get better. It just might take some time. And to be honest I am not the most patient person when I need the stress of life sucking to go away.

What do I do. Well, nothing and everything. I take a deep breath. I write. I talk. I cry. I do whatever I need to do. And when it still feels like life will not fix itself, I go through. Because what else can we do but go through. Sometimes moving forward is not the thing. Sometimes we have to go through the sludge and the guck and the crap to get to the other side.

And once we get to that other side it might be a good idea to look back and ask why did life suck at that time. Was it because of a choice I made. Or was it life giving me a swift kick in the butt. Once you understand it maybe you can change something next time. Or maybe you learn how you handle a bag full of life lemons. And maybe you can make a lemon meringue pie with it. I do not like lemon meringue pie or lemonade. Lemon water. I like lemon water. I digress. The point is to make something with the lemons so they do not rot.

And if you start to have those thoughts you know the ones I mean or a voice starts telling you to do harm, please get help. No one is better off without you. Not even the super villain from the crime shows. And you should never listen to any voice telling you to do harm. Someone in your life would miss you. You never know. Everything you are going through could be leading you to something better. You just might not know what that is yet.

Does life suck. Yes. Is the world on fire. In a manner of speaking maybe. But will it get better. Yes, I believe that.

My favorite time for driving in Summer. School is out, the roads finally calm down, and for a minute it feels like the world remembers how to breathe. And honestly, does anyone else hate driving now.

I used to love it. The freedom, the quiet, the let’s just go for a drive and clear my head feeling. Now every time I leave the house, I am either irritated, scared, or irritated because I got scared.

And let me say this upfront. If you are one of those people who goes from mild annoyance to full on homicidal rage behind the wheel, you need to get a grip. It is not that deep.

But seriously, why can’t anyone drive anymore.

I am not pretending I am perfect. I have done dumb things on the road. I know it the second it happens and I feel like an idiot. But at least when you know you messed up, you try not to repeat it. That is the difference.

Like the other day. Four way stop. I stop. She stops after me, but she is to my right. I let the car ahead of me go, then I go. And this woman, who absolutely saw me stop first, suddenly decides she should go too. She rolls forward like she owns the intersection and then lays on her horn at me like I personally ruined her day. She had pedestrians to wait for (we are driving in a historic small town road). She was not ahead of me. And if she had hit me, it would have been her fault. Come on.

Why are we like this. Why do people think it is normal to tailgate, cut people off, weave through traffic, or act like the road belongs to them and the rest of us are just in their way.

If I am already going ten over and you are still glued to my bumper, go around me. If it is a one lane road and I am going the speed limit, get off my ass. If we are in traffic and no one can move any faster, do not flick me off like I am the one controlling the universe.

And flipping someone off. Absolutely not. People’s crazy flags are flying high these days. You do not know who is going to go full Criminal Minds over a hand gesture. Do I sometimes want to. Yes. Do I value staying alive. Also yes.

So how do we fix this. I honestly do not know. People are getting worse, not better. All we can do is drive, ignore the idiots, and remind ourselves that half the time the jerk who cut you off ends up at the same red light anyway. Or turns at the next street. Or gets off at the next exit. All that drama for nothing.

And do not tell me you cannot tell the difference between someone being a jerk and someone rushing because something is actually wrong. You can see it. The panic, the crying, the fear. There is a difference.

Also, I will not lie. It is deeply satisfying when a cop is in the right place at the right time and catches one of the road goblins in the act. If that offends you because you drive like a jerk, that is on you.

For the rest of us who are just over it, I bow in respect. Deep breath. We will survive. This is coming from someone who remembers driving down a road and not seeing another car for miles.

Ok, I am jumping off my soap box, though I am sure I will jump on it again.

Have you ever taken those personality tests? I am sure you know the ones, because I am 100% sure you have taken at least one in your lifetime. If you have been in any kind of job, I am sure you have been asked or told you must complete one or more. I have also heard there are some families that make potential in-laws take these tests to make sure they will be a good fit. Now, I am sure some of you are shaking your head at this, but think about it: we have a thousand different tests to help you figure out what box you should be in.

Well, what if you just don’t feel like you fit in any box?

What started this line of thinking? Nothing really—just me at the end of the day feeling mentally exhausted. I’m thinking, why am I so tired? Well, stress (because I am living, which is a whole different topic), work, you name it. Then I started thinking about something. I always say it is because I am in a job where I have to be extroverted, even though I am really an introvert. But then again… am I? Because I don’t always feel like an introvert.

And here’s the thing—we have all these “verts” now. Introvert, extrovert, ambivert, omnivert, and now, apparently, otrovert.

I know they’re supposed to be about your social battery—how fast you drain around people or how fast you recharge. But somewhere along the way, it stopped being about a battery and turned into a whole personality label. The test tells you which one you are, and suddenly, that’s your whole identity.

Though as I have gotten older, I am definitely not as friendly as I used to be. But is that because I am constantly draining my battery? Am I an introvert because it’s true, or just because a test put me in that box? All my jobs have been in some form of customer service; they require me to be outgoing. I am very good at it, too. I’m told I am polite and kind—even when I must tell people “no.” But even when I’m being my most polite, it still drains the meter.

So, am I really extroverted? Because when I come home, I am drained.

What I am trying to say, in a very long‑winded way, is that I think we have all placed ourselves in boxes. We needed a way to describe our personalities, so we took a test. Well, guess what? Like any test, these are really just a snapshot of that moment in your life.

I think I have been putting myself in a personality box. I am tired of people thinking that because I like to read and value my alone time, I wouldn’t do well in a large group or be able to work a room. I know there are people who are born to be the MC of the room, and that is not me. But I also know that I can be that person without a problem.

I don’t want to call myself an introvert, extrovert, ambivert, omnivert, or otrovert. (Yep, they added another one.) If I did need to put myself in a box, I would probably be an otrovert now. I have moved from introvert, to ambivert, to otrovert.

To be honest, while I would love to say all of these tests helped me—and maybe they did at the time—now I just feel tired and unsure where I fit. Maybe I should take another test to see where I am now, but I think at some point we just must learn that we are not just one thing. And honestly, throughout the day your personality can change.

We just need to find the thing that gives us joy and allows us to breathe. I know, easier said than done. It is why I started blogging; I know I can’t be the only one that feels this way.